Isn’t it ironic, that when we think we would need confidence the most are the times, where it is nowhere to be found?
What kind of witchcraft is it, that when we have it, it’s invisible, and when it’s not present, we feel the lack of it so bad?
Because when I feel confident, I don’t have any thoughts about how great I am, nor any pep-talk flavored self-assurance. None.
It feels natural.
It feels calm.
It’s a feeling, that whatever unexpected obstacle appears, I’ll handle it. It feels spacious. As if I would have an increased capacity to notice things and to come up with new ideas or even solutions.
Looking at the cases where we want to have confidence made me realize what is actually going on here.
We want to feel confident, when there is such a great unknown in front of us, that renders us insecure.
But the opposite of insecurity is not confidence.
(Space for surprise!)
It is courage.
Courage can help us through situations, where insecurity is present.
Doing something regardless of fear is courage. That is the stepping-stone between insecurity and confidence.
Courage brings us through messy times, but doing so only, when we feel drawn towards our desire so much, that regardless of the fear and insecurity present, we decide to move.
And when we did so, we can start to experience confidence.
So when you think, you need confidence, what you actually need is courage.
And when you have courage, you will have confidence too.
Andrea Jacso 